In case anyone still comes across ths blog, I don't want to leave you hanging! I survived my pregnancy and our little girl arrived on July 5th at 2:15pm via scheduled c-section. She is beautiful:) She was 8lbs, 20 1/4 inches long. We are soooo in love!
She ended up with a giant birthmark on her back which will need to be removed due to the high risk of melanoma. She will need to have skin expanders for a few months prior to the surgery, which will not be fun. She already had to have laser surgery to fix her upper and lower lip tie, which was impacting breastfeeding. Not many doctors acknowledge that this can affect nursing and a baby's latch. Wish I had know this before when I tried (and failed) to breastfeed my son. We found a dentist in California who does laser surgery on infants so we packed up and left on a little adventure. It was tough to see my little girl held down to have the surgery (she was awake, but they numbed her up), but the dentist said it was one of the most severe he had seen and that the space between her teeth would have been very large if we had waited. She still would have needed surgery if we had waited, only it would have to be done under general anesthesia. We really wanted to avoid that and in the end, we are very happy we made the decision to do it. Two different doctors we have been to lately also agreed that we made the right decision.
Poor thing also has terrible reflux and is now on Zantac, which was a miracle drug for her. She has also had specks of blood in her stool, so it looks like it is either an allergy to something specific that I am eating or she has an allergy to my milk protein. The latter would be sad for me since this time I actually have a good milk supply and haven't had to use formula (even though there is nothing wrong with using formula). The specialist we saw said that I would not be killing her with my milk and that I could continue to breastfeed, but that if her symptoms became worse or she was not growing she would recommend switching to formula. She said that if she seems happy and is growing well that I could continue doing what I am doing. I am still trying to cut out foods that she may be sensitive to, but I haven't seen huge changes yet. I will take it week by week at this point.
Not gonna lie, it has been very difficult to have two children under the age of 18 months. It is hectic, but I would still take this over infertility. My worst day of parenthood thus far has been better than my best day of infertility. Infertility is just plain difficult. Parenthood is difficult, too, but not in the way infertility is. Infertility does not give you the reward of a smile at the end of the day. Infertility doesn't do anything cute. You can't dress infertility up to be pretty. You really can't cuddle infertility.
I do have to say that infertility gave me some very close new friendships and while it ruined others it strenghthened some of the friendships I already had. It also made me a stronger person and taught me to seize the moment. We never put off trips for infertility, but this is mainly because of our connection to the airline industry. I understand that the majority of infertiles have no choice but to put off treatment and trips for financial reasons. We were just very fortunate to be able to travel so much. It was all I had at the time and I clung to my travels. So glad I did because I was right all along in saying that it is not the same traveling with kids.
So, now I am just rambling. My point is that I hope those who are still struggling with infertility can reach their dream of having a family one day, no matter what that look like and that somewhere in my ramblings there is information that is useful to even one person.
I will try to update as I go, but I know that it is often tough to read blogs about parenthood while you are struggling. Please feel free to contact me by leaving a comment and I will be in contact (I know, I know, there have never been any comments left for me in all of my years of blogging, but you could always be the first!).
Best of luck on your journey. Don't give up if you have even the smallest shred of hope left in your heart...
